thoughts on the year passed and the year ahead

1.03.2013

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time is a funny thing, isn't it? days can fly by or drag on. this year seemed, for the moments i was in, an everlasting stretch. looking back on it now though, i can't really believe its gone. i'm sure i'm giving you a dose of cliche. but time...it is a funny thing. a beautiful thing. i find myself trying hard to sum up last year in a single paragraph, perhaps with some piece of knowledge i came across, an inspiring lesson, something astounding i discovered. silly girl, when are you going to learn that there simply aren't words for some things? because time isn't something i should spend in order to have something to say at the end of the day. it is not a process of engaging myself so that i can have something interesting to blog about, to impress my friends. sometimes i'm so busy with life, it doesn't cross my mind that i might want to remember what is happening. sometimes i'm not busy at all, and that's okay. i find that i take life as it comes. there are times i grin and bare it, times when i cannot get enough. moments i wish i could relive. others i dread to even reminisce. people say life is crazy, life is good, life is a bowl of cherries. and here is what life (these past twelve months) is to me. 
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it is a story
it is moving on from highschool, but not moving away from home, learning to sacrifice, learning to love life
it is being surrounded daily by sweet little faces
it is having my life touched by people i don't know, witnessing that the body of Christ is everywhere
it is shooting my first engagement couple, being blessed by them
it is new life in spring
it is fresh food from our garden in summer
it is breathtaking color in autumn
it is hot cups of tea in winter
it is chaos
it is truly enjoying good health, because it has a whole new meaning to me now
it is a neverending process of learning
it is being restless until i rest in Him, finding only He can satisfy wholly
it is fearing the unknown, being comforted by hope
it is noticing that my sunday morning drives to church are paintings, blue skies and green fields
it is finding out that love brings us closer and heals our hearts in ways we could not imagine
it is little outtings with cousins and friends, laughing so hard our stomachs hurt
it is failing, falling, and being taken under His wing
it is making plenty of mistakes
it is relying on Him for all my needs
it is laced with sickness and sadness, prayers and tears
it is dancing on the stage for the last time, dancing under the stars for the first
it is knowing things will never be the same, learning to be okay with change
it is movie dates and dinners with my man
it is leaving for beach conference with new friends, coming back home as close friends
it is letting out hurt, speaking and not holding it in anymore
it is having forgiveness because of grace
it is a journey
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life is a constant of understanding that i am blessed with breath in my lungs. it is remembering to live for my Jesus, to love because i am loved. this year, i want to seek Him more. i want a hunger placed deep inside of me that leaves me wanting Him more than anything this world can give me. i want an appetite for life, whatever it brings me. i want to be thankful. i want to stop wanting things to go my way, and to appreciate the spontaneous moments that occur, knowing these moments were planned by Someone all along. i want to be content. i want to see the beauty amongst the pain, to strive for joy reguardless of my circumstances. and so, two thousand thirteen is here. twelve months, just twelve. i could say that want to make them count, do something great with this year. but all i want is a sincere want for Jesus, to always lean on Him. and everything else in my life will follow.

happy new year, my friends
x

10 comments:

  1. This is beautiful, Madison. 2012 has been a full year for you...me too and I cannot wait to see what wonderous things God will bring out of 2013.

    "life is a constant of understanding that i am blessed with breath in my lungs." YES.

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  2. Lovely. This was so refreshing to read! xo

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  3. beautiful. you have such a way with words. thank you for sharing. xx | Natalia.

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  4. Sometimes, Instagram posts are the best kind of posts. This is wonderful. Let's make these twelve months count. Twelve months isn't a whole lot, when you think about it - let's fill them up!

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  5. this is beautiful, real, and needed. I will forever be in awe of your writing talent, the end :) xx.

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  6. I really don't know what else to say other than this is so stunning and beautifully written. you voice your thoughts and heart so well, dear.
    xoxo

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  7. your words shine a new kind of light on life. i love your beautiful perspective.
    xoxo

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  10. Madison, so good to know you through your profile on the blogger. I am so glad to stop by your blog and came to know more about your faith. You are a follower of the Lord Jesus Christ which helps me to connect with you. I am in the Pastoral ministry in the great city of Mumbai, India a city with great contrast where richest of rich and the poorest of poor live. We reach out to the poorest of poor with the love of Christ to bring healing to the broken hearted. We also encourage young people like you to come on a short term missions trip to come and work with us. We would love to have you come with your friends on a short term missions trip to work with us. My email id is: dhwankhede(at)gmail(dot)com and my name is Diwakar Wankhede

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